“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light” - Albus Dumbledore

A few winters ago, I faced one of the most stressful experiences of my life—perhaps the most stressful.

I’ve experienced heartache, the loss of loved ones, setbacks, and financial hardships, but nothing compared to this. During this time, I had to make a choice: apply what I had learned through Rare Faith and lean on those mindset principles, or fall back into old patterns of thinking and remain a victim of my circumstances.

The truth was, the situation I found myself in was a mix of poor judgment on my part, combined with others exercising their agency in ways that were vindictive, greedy, and deceitful. God's hand was also evident, guiding me toward valuable lessons. But ultimately, I had to decide how I would face this trial. Trying to make sense of how I got there wasn’t helpful—it was irrelevant by that point. I had to move forward.

Terror barriers loomed over me during those months, and each one tested my faith.

Some barriers involved taking steps of faith that seemed irrational, yet I knew in my heart they were right. But the biggest terror barrier was this: believing I was enough. Could I continue to lean into my faith so that God would know He could count on me? Could I provide for my children when every external circumstance suggested I couldn’t? Was I enough for Heavenly Father? Was I enough for myself?

At 45 years old, I realized that I had never truly believed I was enough. My family and friends always told me I was. Church leaders taught me that I was. But I couldn’t believe it for myself. That self-doubt had cast a shadow over my life for years, and I knew that if I wanted to change my outer circumstances, I had to change my inner thoughts. It became clear that until I fully embraced my own worth, no external validation would ever feel like enough.

So, I made a commitment to change.

Every day, I studied the principles governing my thoughts. I journaled, prayed, and cried—often. I learned to let others offer me support, something that was uncomfortable but necessary. I leaned into meditation and affirmations, and I drew on every bit of spiritual support I could muster.

Then, something shifted. The darkness lifted. I realized I was enough. I could finally say it without hesitation, without choking on the words. And I believed it. The light and peace I felt were the most profound personal experience I had ever had with the Law of Polarity. As Leslie teaches, everything has an equal and opposite counterpart. I learned that this principle doesn’t just apply to challenges and circumstances—it applies to our feelings as well.

The circumstances I faced eventually resolved, but only temporarily.

More extreme challenges would follow. But the stress I felt during those heavier trials was far less, because I had already been through the lesson. I had experienced the shift from extreme darkness, depression, and anxiety to an intensity of light, love, and hope I had never felt before. And because of that, I was equipped with the mental tools to face whatever life threw at me next.

Life hasn’t magically become simple or easy. I still carry the heavy burdens of raising children with mental illnesses. But now, the light I feel is directly proportional to the darkness I used to experience. And that is worth every effort, every terror barrier I had to push through.